Why I’m Getting Rid of My Book Collection
Yes, you’ve read that correctly. After years of collecting books and building my library to over 300 items, I’ve decided to not only stop collecting, but to also get rid of them all. As a bibliophile, and as a designer, who is obsessed with printed ephemera this is a lot easier than I thought it was going to be.
You’re probably wondering why, and how, I made this decision. It doesn’t make sense that I spent so many years and money collecting. I even started this blog not knowing that one day I would rid of the things that formed this part of my identity. But the reason I’m doing this is because of exactly that.
When the pandemic began I found myself purchasing many more things than I intended to. Like everyone else I didn’t know what the future held for me. I overspent on food, home goods, and eventually books causing me to break my book-buying-ban. Despite knowing my buying habits I rationalized that it was okay because I would have more time to read them.
I found myself falling back into my old routine of searching for and purchasing books It became my hobby and I spent hours perusing the web. I purchased them in bulk to save on shipping, flipped through some of them, and then put them on the shelf. Never to be viewed again. The worst part is the only time they were removed from their shelves was when I moved apartments.
Although all of my books made it to their new home they will not spend much more time on the shelves before they leave again.
I began reflecting on my life as the pandemic did not seem like it was ending any time soon . I’ve reflected on major aspects of my identity like my hobbies, my career, my short-term and long-term goals, and how I perceive my lifestyle. When I came to realize the life I see for myself in the future I did not see stacks and stacks of books, slowly gathering dust on their yellowing pages. And I suddenly began to worry.
It felt like the walls were closing in on me and piles of books began to become a tomb I was trapped in. I wondered how I could possibly live with so many of these things I barely touched? Did I wonder how many more books I would garner within the next 5, 10, 20, 50 years? And I wondered if I would not mind moving all of these books again, and again, and again?
To reduce some of the anxiety I decided to reflect once again. This time I asked myself:
Why am I collecting all of these books?
What is their purpose?
What should I do with them?
The answers came quickly. I realized I collected all of these books because I associated them with my identity. I realized that I wasn’t attached to the information within the books but the act of consuming them. I loved the smell of the ink, the tactility of the pages, and the information on every single page. I love the bookish culture that romanticizes stacks and stacks of books piled on every available surface, overstuffed bookcases, drinking hot beverages while curled up in bed with the latest contemporary and perusing pages collecting visual inspiration. I still love walking amongst the shelves of my local Barnes & Noble and my local library pulling books off the shelves and rushing through their descriptions.
Most importantly, I loved that others associated me with the knowledge that the books carried. People thought I was smart because I had so many books. I attributed my personality from my things, and I feared that I would be no one if I didn’t have, and didn’t keep collecting more. I attributed my happiness outside of myself and onto these immaterial goods.
There is nothing wrong with having a ‘bookish” identity but I don’t need to purchase and collect books in order to live that life. I don’t know what this means for Bibliografik, and I’m not sure how it’ll adapt. But I am certain it’ll remain a resource to graphic designers.